Dear, Unites States, I Resign.
Sharpen your Sharpie, #45’s SAG-AFTRA resignation was just a practice run for this week’s impeachment hearings.
To the Dis-Honorable, Members of The Unites States Senate:
I write to you today regarding the so-called Senate Committee hearing aimed at revoking my presidential membership. Who cares!
While I’m not familiar with your work, I’m very proud of my work on projects such as Super Spreader 2020, The Mexican Children Petting Zoo, and The Leaning Wall of New Mexico. And, one of the highest-rated television shows in history on January 6, 2021 — to name just a few!
I’ve also greatly helped the Senate (said to be a dying platform with not much time left until I got involved in politics), and created thousands of jobs at organizations such as The Capitol Police, the National Guard, and Fake News FBI, among many others.
Which brings me to your blatant attempt at free media attention to distract from your dismal record as a Senate and your current do-nothing president. Your organization has done little for its members, and nothing for me — besides refusing to promote dangerous un-American policies and ideas — as evident by your running away from my friends when they came to your place of business to help. They were chanting, “Why isn’t the union fighting for me?” and you ran and hid, like cowards.
Your disciplinary failures are even more egregious. You let all those people who testified at the first Witch Hunt go without firing them or anything.
I no longer wish to be associated with your organization.
As such, this letter is to inform you of my immediate resignation. You have done nothing for me.
Regards, President Donald J. Trump,
THE BESTEST PRESIDENT IN THE HISTORY OF THE UNITES STATES!!!!!