15 Doormats to Deter a Former Vice President from asking to Sleep on Your Couch

Are you worried that every knock on your door could be the former Vice President and his family looking for a place to stay? We have a solution for you. These handy doormats say GO AWAY without the pesky need to answer the door.

Kristine Laco
Jan 28, 2021

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Nothing says ‘We support the LGBT community’ like a rainbow. Nothing says ‘Run Pence, before they get you,’ like a rainbow.
Hard to couch surf when the couch has gone surfing.
And they want you to come try.
Who needs that publicity again?
Tell them Don sent you.
That should make for an interesting dinner conversation.
Walking away could save your life.
Fast!
Mother? Could they possibly mean me?
I’d rather originate from monkeys than from my brother and sister not being able to resist each other.
Scary!
It might mean they appreciate your visit, or it might mean the FBI is on their way. Only one way to tell.
The universal welcome.
And they use the couch.
And maybe renting a house.
#16, but Bernie is always a bonus.

Now you can get back to your regularly scheduled program, that large glass of wine, and your takeout. No one will disturb you.

Blank doormat image from Home Depot.

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Kristine Laco

My middle finger is my favorite. Satire is my jam. Don’t follow if Laco-intolerant. BE COOL--SUBSCRIBE TO MY NEWSLETTER eepurl.com/hqpXiv